Ten More Silly Questions About Homeschooling

Sadly, there are so many of these that they couldn’t be contained in one post.

-~-

Their question: “How do you do gym? You don’t have a gym.”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “…what’s your point? You don’t need a gym to get exercise. I play softball and run, neither of which require a gym. I wouldn’t want to exercise in a gym, anyway. I’d rather be outside where it’s sunny and there’s fresh air.”

-~-

Their question: “How do you know when you’re done with a subject? Does your mom, like, ring a little bell when each period is over? [Insert look-at-me-I’m-so-funny laughter.]”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “How stupid are you that you can’t figure out when you’re done with a subject?! I don’t need anyone to ring bells for me. (What am I anyway, Pavlov’s dog?) I work at a subject until I’m finished. One day my math might take twenty minutes. Another day the problems might be trickier and it’ll take forty-five minutes. Either way, I’ll work until I’m finished. It’s not that hard to figure out.”

-~-

Their question: “Doesn’t it drive you crazy to spend so much time with your family?”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “Yeah, sometimes. But I can go to my room if I want to be alone, and it’s not like I’m always with them. Besides, I’d think it would be harder for you exactly because you don’t spend as much time with your family. When you spend lots of time with anyone, it pretty much forces you to learn to get along with them.”

-~-

Their question: “Do you even know what grade you’re in?”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “I’m homeschooled, not stupid, so I do know what grade I’m in. But grades don’t matter much in homeschooling anyway. I’m doing tenth-grade work in some subjects and more advanced work in others.”

-~-

Their question: “Do you sleep in until noon?”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA not when I have Mom as my mom. She gets up at like five every morning, is ultra-productive right away, and can’t understand why everyone else isn’t bursting out of bed just as early.  So compared to you guys I do get to sleep in, but kids shouldn’t  have to get up at five in the morning just to be at school on time when school doesn’t even start until closer to eight. I feel sorry for you.”

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Their question: “Do your parents automatically give you straight As since they’re, you know, your parents? I bet they do.”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “No, they’re actually pretty tough graders. And honestly, giving me undeserved As wouldn’t help because in college I could end up in an advanced class that I shouldn’t be in because I don’t actually understand the subject.”

-~-

Their question: “Are your parents even smart enough to homeschool you?”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “Do you have any idea how offensive that was? If they don’t know a subject then I take an online class for it, or whatever. ”

-~-

Their question: “Can you convince my parents to homeschool me?”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “Hey, it’s cool that you’re interested in homeschooling. It really is. But I get the feeling that you and your parents have already argued about this, and I don’t want them mad at me.”

-~-

Their question: “Do you have to stay at home from eight until three on weekdays?”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “Believe it or not, it is possible for kids to be outside of school during school hours without them melting like the Wicked Witch of the West. You should try it sometime.”

-~-

Their question: “What’s the square root of one hundred / where’s Paraguay / who was the fifth President of the United States / who’s Lady Gaga?”

My immediate response: “Uh…”

The intelligent response I think of hours later: “[Answers the normal questions perfectly and then laughs later when the questioners make stupid mistakes like writing “It’s” when it should be “Its”.] Excuse me? If you’re going to be worried about the effects of homeschooling, shouldn’t you be more concerned about the academic bits? Who really cares about the pop culture references? And by the way, Lady Gaga’s music makes me want to hurl myself off a cliff.”

-~-

Guess what, guess what, guess what?! Softball season has begun once again, so that means my teammates will find out I’m homeschooled, look horrified, and… begin a brand-new round of questioning.

I can’t wait.

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About nevillegirl

Elizabeth, University of Iowa class of 2019. Double majoring in English & Creative Writing and Journalism. Twenty-year-old daydreamer, introvert, voracious reader, and aspiring writer. Passionate about feminism and lesbian positivity.
This entry was posted in Homeschooling, Nevillegirl's Adventures!, Non-Neville Posts, Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Ten More Silly Questions About Homeschooling

  1. Amanda says:

    OOOOOOOOOOOH. I’ve heard nearly all the questions on both your posts. And I have similar answers to most of them. I actually remember some of them at the time, thankfully. And I totally get the grade one. I do advanced work in some things, slightly behind in some others, and rarely anything that is dead-on or even has a specific “grade level”! When someone asks what grade I’m in, sometimes I get annoyed and just tell them my age. 😛

  2. themagicviolinist says:

    Thankfully, most of my friends are homeschooled, so they don’t ask stupid questions like those.

    I’ll throw myself off “The Edge of Glory” before listening to anything by Lady Gaga.

    • nevillegirl says:

      I wouldn’t call most of the people who ask me these questions “friends”… I prefer my friends to be smart. xD

      • themagicviolinist says:

        LOL! XD Same here. Dumb people have nothing interesting to talk about. Sometimes even my smart friends don’t want to talk about smart things. (Not usually, though).

  3. MOHE says:

    But with those questions, now you’ll have at least some of the brilliant answers!

  4. The Cogaroo says:

    I love how somebody else understands homeschooling! I’m going to have to remember some of these answers, as I have the same answer as you: “Um…”

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