I SO wanted to love this book… because all my friends did! I thought I would finish it and scurry off to go fangirl with them! Instead, I finished this book with a dejected sigh because… well, many reasons, actually. ONE OF THEM IS HAZEL. She’s pretentious and obnoxious and… she’s
supposed to be sixteen? I thought she acted like she was twelve or thirteen. NOOOOO WHYYYY.
2. Tyrion Lannister
A Song of Ice and Fire series by George R.R. Martin
OH, TYRION. I’m so conflicted about him! I love his bookishness, but I hate hate HATE
how he treats Shae – how he treats women in general, honestly. People keep telling me that he has a great, self-deprecating sense of humor but, like… so does his brother Jaime! IDK. I just feel super disconnected from the rest of the fandom’s adoration of Tyrion.
3. Jace Wayland
The Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare
Boy Meets Boy by David Levithan
Paul is just so BLAND. This book made me want to take a nap! PAUL, GET A HOBBY OR SOMETHING. YOU NEED TO BE MORE INTERESTING.
5. Simon Spier
Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli
I was sooooo excited for this book because of all the hype surrounding it! It disappointed me, though, and one of the things I didn’t like was SIMON! I just… gah. He was perfectly nice, but completely boring!
6. Scott Pilgrim
Scott Pilgrim series by Bryan Lee O’Malley
I looooove the CONCEPT of this story: Fighting people as if they were characters in a video game! THAT’S SO COOL. Unfortunately, I… have less-than-favorable thoughts about the protagonist. Scott is such a deadbeat! And… well, he dates an underage girl and is super super biphobic and gross and… BLEHHHH. I want to rewrite the entire series with a girl as the protagonist. (A girl fighting all those characters in order to date Ramona Flowers, obviously. MAKE ALL THE STORIES QUEER. ALLLLLLLLLLLLL OF THEM.)
7. Lola Nolan
Lola and the Boy Next Door by Stephanie Perkins
8. Tris Prior
Divergent series by Veronica Roth
LE SIGH. There are the great female protagonists of our day and age, and then… there’s Tris. And Tris is the biggest problem I have with this story, honestly. Veronica Roth created a good plot! But… Tris. YOU’RE SO BLAND. PLEASE JOIN PAUL IN THE PURSUIT OF DEVELOPING A HOBBY.
9. Jacob Portman
Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs
Jacob is very sweet… I liked that. But his indecisiveness?! UGH. It took him FOREVER to figure out what he wanted to do, explore the island, et cetera. JACOB. HURRY UP, PLEASE.
Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan
…who decided this book was a good idea? SERIOUSLY. I WANT TO KNOW. Nick is a selfish, petty, misogynistic, homophobic, spoiled brat. This book is about – among other things – the queer music scene in NYC and… no. Just no. WHY did Cohn and Levithan think this narrator was a good idea?!
SO. I learned three things from writing this post:
1. I need not limit this list to protagonists.
2. I tend to judge male characters harder than female characters. (But surely that makes up for all the people – and there are a lot of them – who do just the opposite?!)
3. “Characters I just didn’t click with” can mean a variety of things. Sometimes the character BORED me. Or annoyed me. Sometimes I HATE them. Sometimes… sometimes, I feel conflicted about a certain character. (Hello, Tyrion?! I feel like I’m standing on the sidelines while the rest of the fandom is all like YAY TYRION and I’m just like WHAT.)
But I digress.
So! Your turn! What characters did YOU not click with? Why?! Were they the only terrible character in an otherwise good book, or did the rest of the story suck too? And and and… do you find yourself disliking certain qualities in real people as well in fictional characters? I’M REALLY CURIOUS.