This February, I’m doing #LoveMe, a challenge designed to help you learn to love yourself! One of my New Year’s resolutions was to be kinder and more gentle to myself, so I’m trying to be as positive as I can possibly be in 2017 and hope that doing this challenge will be good for my mental health and overall well-being. Check out my previous #LoveMe posts here!
Today’s prompt is:
One thing that’s just for you.
I spent a while pondering what to write about because… well, I wasn’t exactly sure what I was being asked to do here. Was I supposed to write a post that was for my eyes only? But I’m doing this on my blog, where everyone can see it. #LoveMe posts are meant to be shared, meant to be posted on social media. If I posted it in a public place, wouldn’t that sort of defeat the purpose of writing something that was just for me?
Then I decided that I was probably overthinking the whole thing. Maybe the point wasn’t to write a post that was just for me. Maybe the point was to write a post about something that is just for me.
And in my case, that would be alone time. By definition, alone time cannot be shared with others. It is just for me. I love spending time by myself, away from any people.
It’s not the same thing as quiet time. In fact, I listen to music almost constantly. I’d say that the only time I’m not listening to it is when I sleep, but even that isn’t true because I sometimes use it to help me fall asleep. If anything, alone time is a time when my social life goes quiet.
It’s also not a time free from responsibility and productivity. I usually get a lot more done when I’m alone than I do when I’m with other people because now I can finally focus. I look forward to time spent alone because I know I’ll be able to check half a dozen items off of my to-do list.
My alone time is precious and I can’t function without it. Not without becoming moody and irritable, that is. As I’ve discussed numerous times before on this blog, I’m an introvert. I need alone time in order to recharge and keep moving forward with life.
It doesn’t mean I don’t like you. It doesn’t mean I am having a bad day. It’s just how I work. Who I am. And I don’t give it up very easily.
I look forward to all the little moments of the day (and night) when I can be alone. I don’t particularly enjoy getting up early but I have to do so if I want to avoid being late to class, so I do. And I discovered that, although there are still many things to hate about mornings, I love having the world seemingly to myself at that hour: My roommate gets up as late as she possibly can* and the girls in the rooms around us are either also still asleep or else quietly getting ready. The hustle and bustle of the day has not yet begun and it’s wonderful. It almost makes waking up at seven AM worth it.
*Sometimes she goes to bed just as I’m getting up and then I pretend to scold her for her poor life choices!
I cocoon myself away from the world on the walk to class with music that flows out of my headphones and into my ears. I sit by myself in the dining hall, a book in one hand and a fork in the other, not because I am lonely but because I love being alone. I study with friends sometimes, yes, but I love finding small nooks and crannies all over campus in which to hide and finish my homework.
And I really love nighttime because then, even though my roommate is just a few feet above me in her half of the bunk bed, it’s as though I have the room to myself. All is dark and quiet and I’m wrapped securely in many layers of blankets. Alone at last at the end of a very long day.
I love alone time.
What is one thing that’s just for you? (And how do you feel when you don’t get to have it or have to share?!) Is having time alone important to you, or do you find that you need to be around other people in order to feel re-energized?